Well, I’m writing this as some of the biggest sports betting news of the year is breaking — sorry, Albanian Bruce, this one has nothing to do with you — as ESPN and Penn Entertainment have nixed their partnership after two years.
For those of you who don’t follow the ins and outs of the industry side of the industry, this is a level of disaster on par with Adam Gase and the Jets, Urban Meyer and the Jaguars, Chip Kelly and the 49ers.
Like, ruinous.
“When we first announced our partnership with ESPN, both sides made it clear that we expected to compete for a podium position in the space,” Penn CEO Jay Snowden said in a statement. “Although we made significant progress in improving our product offering and building a cohesive ecosystem with ESPN, we have mutually and amicably agreed to wind down our collaboration.”
Well, whaddya gonna do, amirite? Penn has tried and failed with Barstool and ESPN, and now they’re going it alone with their theScore Bet brand.
I guess if you’re Snowden and company, you can take solace in the fact that Kelly landed on his feet with the Raiders, so maybe Penn will figure this out. (Worth noting: Meyer hasn’t coached since his one disastrous season with the Jags. Gase is with a media company called The 33rd Team — and, no, I haven’t heard of it either before just now.)
At any rate, on to Week 10!
The +1000 or more parlay of the week
Let’s not even look at last week’s disaster. ESPN and Penn had a better week than I did, m’kay?
So let’s try and get off the schneid here with the following at FanDuel: the Panthers giving 5.5 points at home to the Saints, the Cardinals getting 6.5 points in Seattle, the 49ers getting 4.5 points at home against the Rams, and the Eagles getting 2.5 points in Green Bay. All told, we’re at +1270, and if we win, we’ll be profitable on the year. See? Simple.
Rationale: The Saints are just terrible and should never be anything less than touchdown underdogs to any other team. The Cardinals offense is finally working with Jacoby Brissett at the wheel, and their defense is good enough to keep them in the game. The 49ers and Rams? Division game + Kyle Shanahan + Christian McCaffrey = really can’t ever count the Niners out. And finally, the Eagles as underdogs? Really?
Obvious three-team teaser that won’t hit
Down to 4-5 after the Lions destroyed my — and everyone else’s — teasers last week. This week, at Caesars for +140: the Panthers getting a half-point at home against the Saints, the Colts giving a half-point at home against the Falcons, and the Seahawks (they’ll win, but it’ll be close) getting a half-point at home against the Cards.
It’s a trap!
Down to 3-6, but really: Recognizing traps just gets harder as the season wears on. This week, one game does, however, stand out: the Bills as 9.5-point favorites over the Dolphins. Fresh off the emotional win over Kansas City at home, Josh Allen and company head to Miami. Are the Bills a significantly better team? Of course. But 9.5 points is a lot, Devon Achane has always had success against the Bills, and there’s a scenario where this game is slow, low, and closer than expected. I’m staying away.
Did I win the DraftKings Milly Maker?
I didn’t, but I did win — with 57 other people — the $3 Showdown slate last Thursday! Love you, Greg Dulcich!
DraftKings DFS plays of the week
I said I loved the Colts-Steelers game last week — with Daniel Jones, overstacked with Michael Pittman, Alec Pierce, and Tyler Warren, with a DK Metcalf bringback. Jones, Pittman, and Pierce all had the fire emoji next to their name. Oh, well. For real, though, if it weren’t for the Colts turning the ball over (checks notes) 932 times …
This week, if you’re not playing Jacoby Brissett for $4.6K in cash, are you even alive?
Mortal-lock, can’t lose, 900 number, send your money now play of the week
Down to 3-6 after the Lions did me in last week. Gimme the Panthers laying the 5.5 points to the Saints.
