I made a proposal to my wife the other night. The parameters are something like this: I can sleep with any other woman who will have me (it’s a short list, but still), my wife will remain 100% faithful to me until the day she dies, she’ll have dinner ready for me at 6:30 sharp each evening, I’m allowed to drink as much booze as I want without a sideways glance, and I retain full and complete ownership, in perpetuity, over both the thermostat and the television remote.
I’m still waiting to hear back.
Which is also the position in which the Major League Baseball Players Association (MLBPA) finds itself after making a, dare I say, even more ridiculous proposal last week, according to the details in an ESPN report.
The MLBPA (in which the average member makes $5.34 million a year) is asking Major League Baseball to work with it on the following: a ban on all player prop bets at sportsbooks, prediction markets, and fantasy sites. The union wants to do this to help protect players from gamblers who are stupid enough to threaten and harass them.
I don’t agree with it, but whatever. Fair enough.
If the MLBPA stopped there, I’d write something about how silly its proposal is, how this will just push prop bets offshore, how keeping it above board actually helps prevent harassment, how it’s crazy to punish 99.9% of reasonable humans because of a few bad apples, and provide every other pro-gambling talking point in the writer’s toolbox — no point in going through them all here.
But the MLBPA didn’t stop there.
Please bet!
The proposal also includes this: Players should be allowed to use their name, uniform, image, and likeness to endorse sportsbooks and prediction markets and fantasy sites. Currently, they are not allowed to do so.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh …
Listen, I get it. The player prop streets went from “Will Kyle Schwarber hit a home run?” to “Will Kyle Schwarber swing at the next pitch, and will that pitch be a fastball, and how fast will it be, and will it be called a ball or strike, and will the catcher punch his mitt pre-pitch, and will Schwarber blink during the windup, and will the pitcher lick his finger to gauge the wind?”
So yes, things may have gotten a wee bit out of hand, as evidenced by the Cleveland Guardians scandal, which — kind of underreported — ended up with the league and its partner sportsbooks agreeing to a $200 limit on pitch prop bets.
From out here in the bleachers, I’m guessing the MLBPA (and the MLB) are feeling a little emboldened about how much sway they have over the sports betting landscape, hence the idea to ban player props.
And again, if that’s all the union was asking for, that’s one column.
But the fact the players are also asking to be able to profit directly from sportsbooks and prediction markets is pretty much the very definition of having your cake and eating it too.
I mean, how could they ask for this with a straight face? You can’t say “prop bets bad” out of one side of your mouth and follow it up with “But come on in and bet the moneyline!” out of the other side.
Good, clean (toxic) fun
The whole point of banning props, in the eyes of the MLBPA, is the harassment, right? Some lunatic drops $50 on whether Schwarber swings at strike one, he loses, and now he’s in the guy’s DMs demanding his firstborn. Nobody should have to deal with that.
But you cannot argue that betting on players is so toxic it needs to be outlawed, and then, in the same breath, ask to be the smiling face of the sportsbook taking the action. Those two ideas can’t share the same space.
Do props genuinely need some guardrails? I mean, sure, maybe. There’s a real conversation to be had about where the line should be, and the players have a right to be part of that conversation.
And again, if they stopped there … but they didn’t. They have, at worst, a quasi-legit gripe that they proceeded to douse with anti-credibility juice when they asked to be allowed to hype sportsbooks.
So no, I don’t think their proposal holds up. Same as I suspect my proposal is DOA.
Weird though, haven’t seen my wife since I pitched it. A lot of the furniture is missing as well. Hmmmph. Weird.
